Friday, 15 August 2014

POST 18!!!! i discovered something interesting the other day....

***I do want to put a blog up about feelings soon, especially regarding the tragic passing of Robin Williams but I will do so when it is ready. Not unconscious ramblings spewed out. He deserves better than that. ***
So as the title suggests... I discovered something interesting the other day.
It is actually a huge thing, that shapes a large part of my life... and I only just got it now...!
I know... I know. don't judge me for being realistically challenged OK... everything happens in good time.
So I know you;re wondering what I discovered... well buckle up because here it is...
I have an actual TYPE.
TA DA! are you still reading or have you closed the page because I'm a lame arse..?
if you ARE still reading... HELLO.... and thanks for staying...
So lets unpack (a nursing phrase used all the time... look at me nursing the shit outta life!!) this further...
I love my husband. I could sex him all day. ALL DAY. TMI...? too bad jealous. I love everything about him... except when he does silent farts in the car and WAITS for it to hit me... :/
ANYWAY... I love him. He is tasty...but I realised that he is MY type. My actual perfect type.
I hadn't ever thought about types in depth before.
Types? I hear you ask.... are you on crack? I also hear you ask. Well...yes I'm on crack... crack being bananas. Find your crack people. I've found mine and I'm never going back...!
OK lets break it down... a type when referring to a person means a particular set of things that you are looking for/attracted to*
So my type, as it turns out is: tanned, dark hair, slim/slender build, tall, and blue eyes (or so i thought) and of a tradie occupation.... BUT Andy has brown eyes and they are the best eyes I have EVER seen.
They are the same colour as Edwards eyes on twilight before they go creepy red.
Now the fascinating thing about this was I thought instinctively that my type was: tanned, blonde, green/blue eyes, surfer... and if I was ever asked what my type was I would automatically reply the above mentioned answer... pre rehearsed and ready.
But I have never really ever dated anyone like this.... sure I have kinda dated some guys like this.... and pashed a few and had some flings with a few but nope.
All the guys i have dated that i was serious about fit 90% of these guide lines... except Lily's dad... he was just... Lily's dad as it happens. Funny how some things that you wouldn't normally do (literally speaking too hahaha... get it...? 'do'... yeah OK... moving on... dad jokes aside) turn out to affect you life so dramatically... in this case.. in the shape of a child...!
So that is interesting.... but I also noticed how none of these relationships lasted... they all went for 2 years at the most and only that long because there was distance... like we didn't share accommodation or work requirements etc.
I mean hey... I know you're thinking maybe I'm just a difficult bitch and you can't live with me... but I don't think that's it. I get along with women folk just fine in the house sharing and I have more male friends than you could poke a stick at... I get along with men just great! So now... little peso (pessimistic) that's NOT the issue...!
i think the issue was that NONE of them were Andy.... yep no Einstein work there. NONE OF THEM WERE MEANT TO WORK. PERIOD. as in full stop... not menstruation.
So yeah I don't mean to get all physiological on your arse but there you go... According to me and my numerous failed romances... it didn't work out because I didn't consciously know what my type was... until Andy... i had never seriously dated anyone with brown eyes before. I am fascinating.
This whole type phenomenon came about because I have been investigating other people types in my spare time. I have some very dear friends who are in the dating game and types is a hot topic of conversation and it is thanks to them I even had this whole brainwave/realisation moment.
So thanks ladies... you know who you are. And trolling tinder with you is one of my favourite things to do!
So many good times to be had at the expense of others...!!! :) and if guys are reading this... don't put a dick pic on there as your profile pic under the name "large"... nobody is going to go there.... trust me... I can assure you!
OK I'm signing off now! Sorry this isn't super hilarious... just my brain/life things atm.
Share the love. G. xx

*definition reference: me. because i'm just that intellectual, and i should probably reference my parents and my school for teaching me words and their meanings.

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