Wednesday, 24 October 2012

blog 6!

omg peeps! its blog number 6. sorry its over a month since my last post! life has been a bit crazy town here...
ok so this time i have some things to discuss and question...
i went out on the town the other week. i go out like once or twice a month usually for special occasions.
i HATE it, unless i'm totally maggot, it sucks balls. It comprises of hours of getting ready, which i honestly have reduced to 30 mins cauz i'm married now and really don't give a flying fark about my over all appearance to anyone. i now don't wear dresses if it is any sort of cold because 1. i have to shave my forest legs, which over the colder months become old growth forests and 2. after the shaving i have to apply layers and layers of fake tan because i am SO white... a tinted moisturiser will simply not cut it!
so no dresses unless it is the height of summer. it is jeans and a nice top. i still wear the killer heels tho. i love them and if the right amount of drinks are consumed then they're not so killer after all.

anyway after all of this glamming is done is time to go out and walk around and spend lots of money i can't afford on drinks that are watered down and then i dance in my painful shoes only to get hit on by little 18 year old boys! dude! i'm nearly old enough to be your mother... in a sick world... but you get my drift!!
ANYWAY... i went out a few weekends ago and was sitting in a nice club having a watered down drink when i started to look around and realise that 99.9% of the girls in there had SUPER short shorts, play-suits and skirts on....! i felt like i was at a continental breakfast display!!! what is fresh hell is going on..?!? there was absolutely nothing left to the imagination and a few particular girls i could actually SEE flaps!!! FLAPS!!!!!!! WTFFFFFFFFF!!!! i was shocked. i was also a bit 'out of it' so i couldn't hid e the look of shock on my face and i sat there for what seemed like 10 minutes with my mouth wide open... it was like being at a car accident... you don't want to look anymore but you just can't look away!!!

so here i am feeling like a complete douche, mouth wide open. i must have looked like an idiot because a very attractive buff bouncer whom was standing next to where i was sitting asked me if i was ok...! i was SOOOOOOOO embarrassed but i just had to ask him how long this fashion shit had been going on..! he said it had only been since the beginning of winter and that he hated it too. that was such a relief! i wasn't the only nanna sitting there. then i had weird vision of us in a nursing home discussing the weirdness of the young people. the strangest thing is this... as i've gotten older. i WANT to go to bed at a reasonable hour. i LONG for my electric blanket and flannie pjs and slippers and movies at home on the couch. i HATE going out a lot, special occasions SURE but just cause..?!?! NO WAY.
i can't afford it. i want to wake up in the morning not hungover because i'm not 18 anymore and i cannot just 'work' through an hangover... i am totally farked ALL day!! ALL DAY. and when you have kids... its just not worth it. not one single person will willingly look after your kids for a full evening and day for you to recover from your hangover. i used to love it but now my priorities have changed...! i love sleep. i love lazy days and not waking up feeling like i've eaten a handful of cotton wool balls!!
so there you have it... flaps and all.
its not hilarious this time... its just me realising i'm ageing... unfortunately!!

No comments:

Post a Comment